


The Open Bed

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Anal Sex, Infidelity, M/M, Non-Consensual Voyeurism, Profanity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-31
Updated: 2014-12-31
Packaged: 2018-03-04 12:07:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3067265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yamaguchi was an option, and it took forever for him to realize the truth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Open Bed

**Author's Note:**

> I refer to them as boys, but they're over eighteen.

Yamaguchi sleeps on the far right because there’s always at least two other people beside him on the bed. Sometimes, it was Bokuto; other times, it was Kuroo. Always, it was Tsukishima. Like Yamaguchi, he was a constant because this was their apartment and this was their bed. The other two boys were outliers, but they mattered just as much as the real residents. At least, Yamaguchi thought so. After all, if they weren’t, there was no way Tsukishima would have invited them over in the first place. There was no way he’d say and do those things to them without feeling something for them. At least, Yamaguchi thought so.

* * *

Sometimes, Yamaguchi would wake up to the sound of the two of them fucking. It didn’t matter if it was Bokuto or Kuroo. He had heard both of them in different instances. In Kuroo’s case, it was more frequent since he couldn’t be quiet to save his life. At times, Yamaguchi had a vague suspicion that Kuroo was doing it on purpose. The nights he was kept awake were evidence enough. Kuroo wasn’t just fucking Tsukishima. He was fucking around with Yamaguchi. Once he knew that Yamaguchi was awake, his moans would grow louder. The “oh yes” and “more” would become louder and louder until the sound literally reverberated off the walls. Tsukishima would hiss at Kuroo to “shut the fuck up,” but of course, Kuroo wouldn’t do it. He was having too much fun, playing around with the knowledge of keeping Yamaguchi awake. It took a lot of self control for Yamaguchi to not punch the asshole, but knowing Tsukishima, he would probably get mad at him. So Yamaguchi would always bite his lip and try his best to ignore the rustling of the sheets and the wet slap of their colliding bodies.

 

The method usually worked and he would drift into an uneasy, but relieving sleep. In his dream world, he was safe. In his dream world, Yamaguchi didn’t have to worry.

 

Bokuto was a lot easier to handle. Although he had a lot of similar characteristics with Kuroo, he was surprisingly quiet when Tsukishima was fucking him. Yamaguchi remembered few instances of him waking up to their sessions. Yeah, he was pretty cool with the guy.

 

That wasn’t always the case though. The first time Tsukishima had brought someone over, he had been furious. He had yelled, cursed, and thrown things, though the items hadn’t struck anyone. Yamaguchi was angry, but he wasn’t violent. The words, _What the hell!_ repeated in his mind over and over. He still remembered the way Tsukishima had quickly walked to him and grabbed his wrists and held him. He still remembered how slow time had seemed when Tsukishima’s lips parted and quietly said, “Calm down.” The cold tone of his voice hit Yamaguchi harder than an actual slap and the only reply he formed was an empty, “What the hell…”

 

And the blonde boy he loved just shook his head because he had nothing left to say. He had remembered the way his tousled hair had swung. _Just like small pendulums counting down_ , Yamaguchi thought. That day, the brunette packed up his clothes and left. He found a hotel aways off and slept there for the night, though it took him a while to “calm down.” Every time he thought he regained control of his emotions (particularly his sadness and anger), the memory of Tsukishima’s lips and cold voice would come flooding back and he would be reduced to a mess all over again. It seemed as if the tears and snot would never end. Yamaguchi couldn’t remember a time when he had cried so hard. The thought scared him.

 

Then, his phone had vibrated. A slow hum that stopped his sniffling altogether. Looking at it with an almost dumb fascination, Yamaguchi had picked it up to find a text displayed on the small screen.

 

“I love you Not him Come back”

 

Deep in his heart, Yamaguchi knew that probably wasn’t true. _If he loved me, then why could he have done those things?_   _Why could he have been so cold, so rational?_ _Why wasn't he **ashamed**?  _ But there was hope in him as well, a part that tried to lie to itself, a part that wanted to go back. _Everybody makes mistakes, even Tsukki. I’m sure he didn’t mean to hurt me. He was out of his mind that time. Yeah... he wasn't himself._

 

And in the end, hope won. Yamaguchi had returned. Packing up his bags again, he had taken the bus back to the complex and climbed the stairs. All the while, his heart had beaten so hard Yamaguchi feared that he would have a heart attack before he reached his destination. In the end, he was alive. In the end, he was alive to return to see that nothing had changed. He saw the clothes strewn about the rooms and understood. He saw that there was no love left in the home they once shared, only the sickening stench of sweat and cum and lust. _Once we had it_ , he had thought when he stepped inside.

 

**Once.**

* * *

Now what was he doing? Really, what the _fuck_  was he doing?

 

Yamaguchi sits up, then slides out of bed. Today, it was just Tsukishima and him. Yamaguchi figures that Kuroo had left early to do whatever he needed to do. His disappearance didn't make much of a difference. Between Tsukishima and him, it feels like they’re miles apart. These days, they were as distant as if they lived on different continents. Hardly speaking a word to each other, they existed but not to each other.

 

Yamaguchi winces as he pulls back the curtains. A strong ray of sunshine hits his eyes and it takes a while to adjust. He can hear Tsukishima groaning in the background. Today, he doesn’t say, “Sorry.” Today, he’s too empty to care.

 

The brunette shuffles his way into the bathroom and does his business. He can hear Tsukishima getting ready now. The rustling of the sheets are becoming louder, he’s willing himself to wake up. Opening the door, Yamaguchi says, “Do you want to use it?”

 

Tsukishima replies with a small nod.

 

They pass each other on their own orbits.

* * *

 

Yamaguchi finds himself in the kitchen. The knives gleam in the light. Yamaguchi stares at them for a few minutes before he remembers that he’s hungry. Preparing a simple breakfast of eggs and toast with a glass of orange juice, he seats himself and eats with mechanical motions. The food tastes like nothing, but he doesn’t mind. This was how he wanted it to end. For the first time in a while, Yamaguchi smiles. It hurt his cheeks a bit, but it felt so good at the same time.

 

When Tsukishima finally joins him, the smile the brunette had had was gone. A solemn expression had replaced it. 

 

“Tsukki.”

 

“Yeah?” He was pouring himself a glass of cold water. Yamaguchi notes the gentle arch of his back and wishes that the scratch marks on it would be gone. He doesn’t want to see any reminders of Kuroo or Bokuto on him.

 

“Do you still love me?” Yamaguchi’s hands are still, but his heart is beating like that time.

 

Tsukishima glances back at him, eyes calculatingly cool. He was always a cool guy. “Why do you need to know?”

 

“Why…” Yamaguchi echoes. Tsukishima sees that his eyes are losing their gleam, and he realizes that he never knew what their color was until now.

 

“I’m doubting you, Tsukki.”

 

The words should have hurt upon impact. It should have angered him. However, Tsukishima was a logical person. He was a cool guy. He knew what made Yamaguchi doubt him and he knew that his doubt was well merited. Yamaguchi deserved to question him.

 

“Is there anything I can do to make you not doubt me?” But he already knew the answer.

 

“Don’t bring them here anymore.”

 

Tsukishima takes a sip of the water, as if he’s genuinely contemplating the proposal. The liquid slides down his throat and he notes how different it feels from the cum that he has swallowed on so many occasions.

 

“And that’s all you need to not doubt me anymore?”

 

“Yes.”

 

Another sip, another memory of the way Kuroo had looked when he came into his mouth.

 

“I don’t know if I can do that.”

 

“Why not?”

 

This time, he chooses his words carefully. All the while, his mind is churning out memories of him fucking. Fucking.

 

“Because I love you… but I like to fuck them.”

 

“What does that have to do with what we’re saying?”

  
  
“When I’m with you, we’re making love. When I’m with them, we’re fucking. No feelings attached.”

 

Yamaguchi is wringing his hands now. It’s a nervous habit of his, but he can’t stop. The hope in his heart is swelling, but the despair is deepening as well.

 

“Tsukki, please.”

 

“I’m being honest.”

 

“You’re hurting me.”

 

The two become silent and the sunlight turns stronger all of a sudden. Tsukishima is half-naked and Yamaguchi wishes that he’d just do something. Kiss him, hit him, fuck him, even kill him. He was drowning and the only thing he could do was stare.

 

(What a cool guy.)

 

“Please.”

 

Tsukishima walks over and kisses him on the mouth. His tongue invades and slides against his own. The slick noise reminds them both of Bokuto and they pull away.

 

Yamaguchi’s hands pull at Tsukki’s boxers. The blonde’s cock is flaccid, but it didn’t matter. They fuck in the kitchen. Sharp hisses escape Tsukishima as he thrusts his way into Yamaguchi. Yamaguchi grunts, but he doesn’t moan. He feels the boy’s cock hardening.

 

“Don’t cum inside me,” he says.

 

Tsukishima is too far gone to form a reply, but when he climaxes, he makes sure to pull out. A last hearing to a wish if you will.

 

When they’re done, Yamaguchi props himself against the table. His legs are weak. His mind is hazy. The emptiness does not abide.

 

“Am I still your lover?” he asks.

 

Tsukishima looks at him and laughs. He shakes his head. The pendulums start. “You cheater.”

 

Yamaguchi can’t help but join in on the laughter. Today, his company is enjoyable.

 

A knock on the door breaks the atmosphere in the kitchen. Yamaguchi pulls up his pants and thinks that maybe it’s Kuroo. Bokuto usually never comes this early.

 

When he opens it, he finds a stranger staring at him. His eyes are clear, but Yamaguchi notices the slight puckering of his lower eyelids. Other signs of fatigue and sorrow surface up. The white pallor of his already pale skin and the way his skin stretches across his bones tightly become all too clear. Even the boy’s black hair seems to have lost its shine.

 

“Is Bokuto here?”

 

Yamaguchi shakes his head.

 

“No.”

 

The boy takes it at face value and doesn’t pry. His eyes don’t wander past Yamaguchi’s face, but remain steady.

 

“Do you have any idea where he might be?”

 

Yamaguchi offers a pained smile.

 

“Check the bed.”

**Author's Note:**

> "You cheater." It didn't feel right to explain it in the story itself, but Tsukishima had previously said that when they had sex, they were making love and when he was doing it with Kuroo/Bokuto, it was considered fucking. Of course the escapade in the kitchen couldn't be considered love in the slightest…


End file.
